Having got home from the pub after a pretty dull evening I present the hugely unawaited results...
Some intended clues didn't happen due to laziness, busyness, no signal, the text not making it back to the UK (bet vodafone still charged me 49p a go for it though), being too bloody cold or being detained by homeland security border patrol but based on the ones that did make it and my original (pissed) points system here are the very dull results...
Clue 1 "I'm where Father Christmas is a bit limp" Santa Fe, NM: votp 50 pts for the correct city.
Clue 2 "Show me the way...", Amarillo, TX: malxscfc "'Amarillo', just short of the OK border", 60pts for City + Area (well near enough).
Clue 3 "Where the wind comes rushing down the plain", Oklahoma City, OK: votp 2pts for correct state.
Clue 4 "Now in abi's half a shed", Abilene, TX: crap clue, not suprised no-one bothered.
Clue 5 "Debbie did it", Dallas, TX: Coops' knowledge of 70's porn films gets 50 points for the correct city.
Clue 6 "a mad place", Waco, TX: can't even remember sending that one.
Clue 7 "Morris's twin", Austin, TX, Ojiveojive 50pts for the city. Fantastic Friday night out, highly recommended if you like beer and live music.
Clue 8 "We have a problem", Houston, TX: ambersalamander 50pts for the city (Histon would've been a real problem not to mention crap navigation).
Clue 9 "Dead Jesus", Corpus Christi, TX: amberaleman 50pts for city (Yes I did get close to the Mexican border. Apparently, the next day, far too close [suddenly being surrounded by a dozen armed homeland security border patrol people can really make your day go downhill quickly]).
Clue 10 "Ant's a spanish saint", San Antonio, TX: peekay 50pts for the city.
Clue 11 "African or Indian arse", the wonderfully named Elephant Butte, NM: malxscfc 0pts but good effort.
Clue 12 "Back at Al's BBQ", Albuquerque, NM: giggy 50pts for the city and Sultan 2 pts for the correct state.
"Clue 13" about being cold: Wasn't back in the UK but was still in Albuquerque where the temperature plummetted to 35F and it snowed.
Final standings:
malxscfc 60pts
votp 52pts
coops 50pts
ojiveojive 50pts
ambersalamander 50pts
amberaleman 50pts
peekay 50pts
giggy 50pts
Sultan of Cannock 2pts
(order of those who tied on 50pts decided by who answered first).
Malx for winning gets absolutely bugger all apart from the satisfaction of knowing that he was better than the others that bothered to waste some of their lives by actually entering this utterly pointless and somewhat dull competition.
I do miss those ladies that loved my British accent though
(The bloke in El Paso wasn't quite what I was looking for but I took the approach as a compliment anyway!)