Post by malxscfc on Jan 19, 2007 21:02:56 GMT
Q: How many Surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Fish.
Q: How many Folk Singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 5. One to change the lightbulb, and 4 to sing about how good the old one was.
Q: How many Psychotherapists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. The lightbulb has to WANT to change itself.
Q: How many Soul Singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 2. One to hold the lightbulb, and one to drive the Pink Cadillac round and round.
One.
Q: How many Psychics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Q: How many Oxford Dons does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 2. One to pour the sherries, and one to summon the Porter to engage the services of that little man from the electricians.
Q: How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: "You avin' a laff, mate?"
Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Well, you must understand, the issue is not about the lightbulb's functionality. It's necessary to consider the wider social context of the CAUSES of why the light is insufficient for today's modern Britain. In real terms, the lux-measurement has decreased by 8% since Thatcher came to power, and as was clear in our last manifesto we have been working hard, in a multi-agency capacity, to ensure the continuation of the progression of an improvement for the welfare of ordinary, hard-working people, vis-a-vis the illumination of this topical subject.
etc. etc. ad infinitum...
----------------
[Forum lightbulb joke, courtesy of Marc on the SCFC Forum, though probably generic:]
"How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.
So true, oh so true..... laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif"
A: Fish.
Q: How many Folk Singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 5. One to change the lightbulb, and 4 to sing about how good the old one was.
Q: How many Psychotherapists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. The lightbulb has to WANT to change itself.
Q: How many Soul Singers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 2. One to hold the lightbulb, and one to drive the Pink Cadillac round and round.
One.
Q: How many Psychics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Q: How many Oxford Dons does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 2. One to pour the sherries, and one to summon the Porter to engage the services of that little man from the electricians.
Q: How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: "You avin' a laff, mate?"
Q: How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: Well, you must understand, the issue is not about the lightbulb's functionality. It's necessary to consider the wider social context of the CAUSES of why the light is insufficient for today's modern Britain. In real terms, the lux-measurement has decreased by 8% since Thatcher came to power, and as was clear in our last manifesto we have been working hard, in a multi-agency capacity, to ensure the continuation of the progression of an improvement for the welfare of ordinary, hard-working people, vis-a-vis the illumination of this topical subject.
etc. etc. ad infinitum...
----------------
[Forum lightbulb joke, courtesy of Marc on the SCFC Forum, though probably generic:]
"How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?
1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
1 to move it to the Lighting section
2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
5 to flame the spell checkers
3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.
So true, oh so true..... laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif"
