Impossible Questions...

[medibot]

There's plenty of them so put them here but i'll start with this one from a cartoon i got sent...

[ambersalamander]

I generally find "Do you regret what happened between us" to be pretty well unanswerable for the same reasons...

[medibot]

There's a good one

There's some more classics, if anybody remembers the "why ask?" sketch from Only Fools & Horses they'll know what i'm on about but i'm looking for more to amuse us all with.

[ambersalamander]

How's about "does my bum look big in this?"

A question that I, for the record, have never asked.

Mine was always something along the lines of "Is this skirt/top/dress/pair of shoes OK for a posh do/night at your mate's/football match, do you think?"

A boyfriend I once had -bless his cotton ones- got around this by saying something like "You look great, but I don't know what else you've got, so I can't tell you if it's the best thing you have for it"

I would then go all gushy and offer a choice of three or so items, and he'd pick the one "you look sexiest in"

That was great. Worked a treat. So no matter what I was wearing I'd always know that my boyfriend thought I looked good in it!

[medibot]

ambersalamander said:

A boyfriend I once had -bless his cotton ones- got around this by saying something like "You look great, but I don't know what else you've got, so I can't tell you if it's the best thing you have for it"

I would then go all gushy and offer a choice of three or so items, and he'd pick the one "you look sexiest in"

Am remembering that one for future awkward situations

[ambersalamander]

Right. But in general, if a woman asks for example "Should I wear the red top or the blue one?" you should ALWAYS answer, "Have you already picked the one you'd like to wear, or do you really have no idea?"

because the answer "Of course I haven't that's why I'm asking you you fool" is rather better than "Oh. Oh, I was going to wear the red one. What's wrong with the red one then? Why don't I look good in it?" which, however you answer it leads to trouble.

Only what I've heard from others, mind!

[medibot]

I generally try and sway the question so nothing can make them look bad and the choice comes down to things that won't start an argument. I'll still f*ck it up mind but i try

[Giggy of Telford]

On a very unrelated note....

Superman is unstoppable yet Batman is unmovable, what would happen if Superman flew into Batman?

[medibot]

The world of comic book geeks would implode?

[ambersalamander]

An unstoppable force and an immovable object cannot coexist in one universe. Therefore either of these things would happen:

a) The collision would cause one or both of them to vanish and reappear in separate universes, or

b) Superman would simply make a hole right through batman's body

[luvlydory]

would it depend on Batmen holding Kryptonite ? (enforcing the fact that superman IS stoppable !)

or if he was in the Batmobile he'd get an awfully large repair bill !! ;D

[Giggy of Telford]

Long story short batman would probably win purely for being 'The Goddamn Batman!'

[DJhinckley]

ambersalamander said:

Right. But in general, if a woman asks for example "Should I wear the red top or the blue one?" you should ALWAYS answer, "Have you already picked the one you'd like to wear, or do you really have no idea?"

as you'd imagine i don't f*ck around with silly questions. if anyone has to ask which top you'd prefer them to wear then it's because they don't want to wear either and want someone else to make the decision for them. f*ck em they're grown ups they can take the responsibility themselves.

if they say "does my bum look big in this?" then tell the truth - yes, it's f*cking huge, you're a woman what size are you expecting it to be.

if they say "do you watch porn?" then tell the truth - yes of course I do, along with 99% of the rest of the world, either pull out a book and read until I'm done, or pull up a pillow and help out.

if they say "Is this skirt/top/dress/pair of shoes OK for a posh do/night at your mate's/football match, do you think?" then tell the truth - who cares, nobody's looking at you apart from me and I'm not going to dictate what you wear, wear what you want and I'll have to put up with it. It's not as if I'm going to get upset because you have the wrong shade of lipstick or something.

and finally, obviously Superman would deflect off at an angle and keep on going...

[Col ISIHAC.]

giggy said:

On a very unrelated note....

Superman is unstoppable yet Batman is unmovable, what would happen if Superman flew into Batman?

As DJ said:

f*ck em they're grown ups they can take the responsibility themselves.
;D

[luvlydory]

ambersalamander said:

How's about "does my bum look big in this?"

is that what Superman said when he tried on his costume ??!